Impure

If I don't blink, I see through everything.

To quench the thirst, a sanctified poison.

I'll remember the taste of water on my lips.

Smoke fills the air, can it numb despair?-

Are you here to help me die?

Watch me feast upon the wind of a cold night sky.

Not humanity's redemption... but a cancer of the soul?

I am not your disease. You are mine.

You can't cure me. So try to kill me. There's only one way to make sure.

Doppelganger

Dark strands twist 'round her head,
it is slightly turned, familiar, hostile.

A face lies hidden in shades of shadow,
With pleasure, the delusion fills in details.

A moment's glance? Or not even that-
Is enough to send shivers up the spine.

In the moment sown, a seed of doubt,
blossoms in a fertile mind, in darkness.

Can I not free myself of this insanity?
While the mind preaches its wisdom
Something refuses to listen, with malice,
For it knows that it can only bring pain.

I have no reason.
And many reasons.

I sit in wait again, aching in search
of the face of the doppelganger.
To redeem myself, or merely
to feed so delicious a madness.

The same mistake perpetuates itself.
And I sit back, and let it happen.

No more

No more
Searching for words,
Each Needless clash of blades
leaves another cut on the skin,
Needless lacerations.

Tired, weak and lost, one continues,
To search for words to set things right,
Left open to interpretation, selflessness
is selfish, despondent, a failed light.

Now I won't fall for it... your cruel trap,
... is just another attempt to drive me insane,

These words carry false feelings, these remnants
of a butchered ego, they sound so vain.

There are blinds on the window, and blinded
I listen, lifetimes have passed since I last heard rain.

This silence,
I find,
has always carried the answer,
I have
Little to lose, but nothing to gain.
And no reason to endure this pain.

Waking

I woke up to a birdsong today,
Finally, after a very long time.
And I lay in bed. Rapt. Silent.
And held on to every note.

For twenty seconds I found peace,
Communion, with nature.
Until I was interrupted,
By twin explosions,
Of malevolent noise.
The Doorbell.
Blow away the birdsong,
and with it, my moment.

Why could it not last longer?
Did the birds stop singing?
I cannot get rid of this pain at the back of my head,
and I can no longer return to sleep.